blue moon cupcakes. for realz.

I remember when I first discovered that there was more to beer than Natty Light and the occasional treat of a Miller Light (oh, college!). The beer that specifically changed it for me was Blue Moon, and to this day there is nothing I love more than squeezing that orange slice in there and taking that first sip of orange-y goodness. I have come to love many other beers (Abita Strawberry comes to mind), and branched out into the world of smaller breweries and craft beers, but I will always remain loyal to my trusty Blue Moon for showing me the light. And NO, Shocktop does not taste the same. So don’t ask.




Alright, la-de-da, I was all up in Pinterest one day when I saw this recipe in the Food + Bev section – BLUE. MOON. CUPCAKES. My rational mind told me it was probably a gimmicky way to rename some sort of orange flavoured cupcake, but whatever, I was still intrigued, and pinned the recipe. Fast forward to this past Friday. I was sitting at lunch, scrolling through my Pinterest boards, looking for an appie to bring to a friend’s 30^th birthday bash, boring the fiancé to death with my musings, when there it was. The cupcakes. I had forgotten all about them. Boom. Making those. Done. Off we went to Whole Foods.

What can I say, they were a hit. I had two myself. Some drunk guy came up to me with crumbs falling from his mouth and prettyyyyy much professed his love for me. No big deal. I don’t think the beer really impacts the taste, but the texture was definitely different. They were not as dense as normal cake, and just, I dunno, fluffier. Definitely worth trying. Plus, you only use about ½ a bottle for one batch, so you have an excuse to drink while they’re cooking. Win.

So, everyone knows by now that I hate measuring shit, but when it comes to baking, I’ve learned the hard way – MEASURE SHIT. And follow the directions. It’s usually not pretty if you don’t.

And on we go!

For 12 cupcakes, you need:
- A stick of unsalted butter, softened
- 1 ¼ cups sugar
- 1 2/3 cups flour
- 1 tsp baking POWDER
- 1/8 tsp of salt (aka a freakin pinch or whatever)
- 2 eggs, room temp
- 1 tsp vanilla extract
- 1 orange, zested
- 2/3 cup Blue Moon
- 2 tbsp whole milk




Preheat the oven to 375.

Put the stick of butter in the stand mixer, and cream it for about a minute. Add in the sugar, and mix for another 3-4 minutes.

Add eggs, one at a time, scraping the sides of the bowl after each one.




Add vanilla and orange zest and mix until just combined. (PS, can I add here that a microplane is the best $12 investment I’ve ever made, and if you don’t have one, let this recipe be a reason for you to go out and purchase one post haste. Citrus zest is amazing. I love it. The end.)




Add salt and baking POWDER.

In a bowl (orrrr your measuring cup, like me), mix together the beer and milk. Add this mixture and the flour to the butter-sugar-egg mixture slowly. I personally used my 1/3 cup measuring thingy and just added the flour 1/3 cup at a time. That’s just me.

Pour the batter into your cupcake pan (if you don’t have liners, like I didn’t, use the wrapper from the stick of butter to grease the cups), and pop it in the over for 15-18 mins. When tops are golden brown and a toothpick/butter knife/whatever comes out clean when inserted, they’re done. Cool completely before frosting.




Ahhh yes, frosting. The best fucking part. Funny story, when I first started dating my fiancé, he was gross and dipped (eww sick right?), and he told me that he would give up dipping if I gave up eating spoonfuls of funfetti frosting straight from the container. I did (and he did), but I still love frosting. Anyway…

For the orange cream cheese frosting, you will need:
- Another stick of butter, softened
- 4 oz of cream cheese (1/2 of one of those small containers)
- 2 ½ cups powdered sugar
- 2 tbsp fresh orange juice (I just squeezed all the juice from the orange I zested, which was probs more than 2 tbsp, but whatever)

Alright, clean out the bowl of your stand mixer (because I don’t recommend doing this by hand), and cream together the cream cheese and butter. Once combined, add the powdered sugar a ½ cup at a time. Scrape sides of the bowl each time you add it. Squeeze in your orange, and mix again until all the juice has been combined.

Once the cupcakes are cooled, ice those bad boys. If you remember, save a little orange zest for garnish. Enjoy!




(Don’t worry if you end up with extra icing. You will. Embrace it. Own it. Save it for the next morning and then creepily stick your finger in the bowl and eat it with your morning coffee).

Oh and my reward for bringing these and some bloomin onion bread to the party? Mudbugs and strawberry abita. Fuck yeah Texas.

Marsala Chicken Thighs!

I have recently discovered the joy that are chicken thighs, and I tend to go to these babies straight off the bat if I’m planning some sort of chicken recipe. Why, you might ask? Well, they’re way cheaper and it is really, really, really hard to fuck them up. I mean, you could probably leave them in the oven for hours accidentally while you, saaaay, have a knockdown dragout screaming match with your roommate, and they will still be all tender juicy delish when you pull them out. At least, I’m pretty sure. Don’t take my word here.

Alright, chicken marsala. Done with chicken thighs, clearly. First off, buy yourself a bottle of dry marsala next time you’re at the supermarket. Or, if you live in the draconian state that is Pennsylvania, I guess go to the liquor store? I dunno, but I buy mine at the grocery store. It’s, like, $8. Great cooking wine.

And while you’re out buying shit, buy this, too:

- Pack of chicken thighs (usually 4)
- Panko breadcrumbs (Asian aisle)
- 2 eggs
- Regular breadcrumbs
- Shredded Parmesan cheese (or buy a hunk and shred it yourself, if you’re motivated and shiz)
- ½ a sweet onion, thinly sliced
- Garlic – 2 cloves, diced
- Mushrooms – a bunch – like, 1 ¼ cups, chopped (I used shitakes, because I had them and I like those, but you can use any kind)
- Butter – ½ a stick + 3 tbsps, divided
- Olive oil
- Salt + Pepper

On a sheet of tin foil, mix up some panko, regular breadcrumbs, and parm. Try to go for a 2:1 ratio of panko to breadcrumbs. The cheese is personal taste. Dash some salt and pepper on there for good measure. Make sure it’s all combined. On one side of this piece of foil, whisk together 2 eggs. On the other side, have another piece of foil, just chillin.

Now, this next part involves getting your hands dirty. Take the chicken out of the package. Rinse it off and pat dry with a paper towel. Dip each thigh in the egg wash, then use your hands to really pat the breadcrumb mixture on there. Place on the other piece of foil. Repeat with all 4 thighs.




So we’re gonna let the thighs sit there for about 10-15 minutes. While they’re doing that, heat up 3 tbsp of butter with 1 tbsp of olive oil. (May I suggest a decent size pan, that has a matching lid? Actually, you kinda need this). When the butter foams, add in the mushrooms, onions, and garlic. Cook over medium heat until the onions begin to caramelize. Remove from the pan.




Throw the ½ stick of butter in the same pan. Oh, and 2 tbsp of olive oil. Bring back up to medium heat. Sear the chicken off in the pan, about 2-3 mins each side. Remove from pan.




Add 1 ½ cups of Marsala wine to the pan, and scrape up the little bits of breading and veggies with a whisk or spatula. Return the chicken to the pan, as well as the mushrooms and onions. Cover the pan and cook for 30-45 mins. Reduce heat if needed. It can actually sit there forever and cook, but definitely go for at least 30 mins. A tight lid is important here for containing the heat.

Alright, serve these bad boys over some plain egg noodles or rice or something. Spoon a ton of yummy sauce all over. Enjoy!

2012 NYC Half Marathon race report

Ahhh, New York! The city that never sleeps! Or whatever… After a nearly 3 year hiatus, I finally sojourned back to the site of many a past adventure (a certain early morning walk of shame through the Puerto Rican Day parade comes to mind – don’t worry, it was in college) and home to the only bagels I will ever find acceptable.






The reason for my visit? The 2012 NYC Half Marathon.

A high school friend and I discovered last fall that we were both preparing for our first marathons – her, NYC, and Philly for me. Since then, we’ve travelled together to Austin for the 3M Half in January and entered the lottery for this half together, as well. She didn’t get in, but I made the journey anyway and had the best cheerleader in the world in the process.

As I got on the train at Newark airport on Friday evening, I realized I kinda miss the East Coast – no one got up to give me their seat and no one gave me the stink eye when I pushed past them to run for the train. It was awesome. I hate when guys in Texas get up to give me their seat or wait for me to enter the elevator. Its patronizing. Dude, I can stand. I’m a big girl. I’m strong. Plus, I can always use a little extra calorie burn. I am still a girl, after all.

ANYWAY… yada yada yada, fun weekend, fast forward to Sunday morning.






The start line was at the bottom of Central Park, around 64th, but, LUCKY ME, I had to trudge all the way up to 89th and Madison because I got nailed by the race organizers, NYRR, for at one point trying to sell my bib on Craigslist (when I first found out my friend could not run the race). I was told at the expo on Saturday that if I wanted to run, I needed to come to the NYRR office between 6 and 6:30 am to get my bib and be escorted to the starting corral. What were they going to do, hold my hand while I waited in an epic porta potty line? I was steaming mad, mostly because I clearly did not fly all the way from Tex-ass to sell a $128 bib, and the fact that they set up an e-mail sting to catch me, and couldn’t be adult enough to identify themselves as NYRR officials in the process chapped my ass even more. I spent the rest of the afternoon stomping around Union Square and cursing the bitch who I assumed would be tailing me to the starting line. But fuck it if I wasn’t going to show up the next morning, cheery as can be, and prove that I was running.

As a consequence of my crime, I had to drag myself out of bed an extra half hour early. We caught a cab uptown, where the bitch from the day before greeted me – “OHHHH, Texas, I remember you” – and went to find my bib. Others were there picking up bibs, but I was clearly the only criminal, as my bib was in a special binder filled to the brim with the e-mails of other folks just trying to get their money back. I am pretty sure that I am the only person who’s bib was in that binder who actually showed up to run.

The lady was telling everyone that they could leave if they had their bib. I put the d-tag on my shoe and started to cautiously back out the front door. Not so fast. She pointed her finger at me – “You. Not you. Come here.” I was prepared to be shackled and chained to this woman for the next hour when she leaned in, pointed at my friend who came with me, and goes, “Does she want to run? I can give her a bib. I’m offering. Does she want to run?” After assuring her my friend was injured, she sent us on our way with a cheery, “Good luck! Have fun! Don’t do it again!” What. The. FUCK.

Central Park was a zoo, and the porta potties were clearly lacking. I waited over a half hour in line, freezing my ass off, and then scurried off to my corral. I had put down an estimated finish time of 2 hours, and was in the 13,000s – about the middle. The race directors spoke and Desiree Davila and Meb too, which was cool. Then, off we went. And by we, I mean the fast assholes at the front. I had to wait another 19 mins to cross the starting line.

I was impressed by the corrals, as everyone around me was running a similar pace. I knew Central Park had some bitch hills, and so I paced myself, trying to stay at around a 9:15-9:30 pace. I was planning to make up time after we left the park, as the remainder of the course was fast and flat. I actually did ok, despite the hills. There was only one, around Harlem, that really knocked me out. The rest were rollers, similar to the ones along Memorial Drive and Allen Parkway, and I’ve run those before. I exited the park right after the 10k mark at 57:05, right on target (ps that's me in the orange pullover and black compression socks).






The course went down 7th Ave, through Times Square, and then made a right hand turn onto 42nd Street, which we rode all the way to the West Side highway. Those 2 miles through the heart of the city flew by, and I had my fastest split at mile 7 (8:49). But I was looking for a porta potty at this point, and had to stop. I grabbed a fucking SICK ASS one by the med tent just before the turn onto the WSH, and was in and out in about a minute. In retrospect, I should have manned up and held it. Or peed on myself. Whatever.

The humidity that morning was apparently at 90%, which makes sense now, since I could barely get my compression shorts back in place. That was another 30 seconds lost.

I hit the WSH and settled in for the last 5 miles. At about mile 9, I was not doing well. I felt nauseous, and my hip flexors and glutes were screaming at me. I couldn’t even fathom the thought of stopping for fluids – even water sounded horrible to me. I forced a GU Chomp down with some water around mile 10, just to get something in my stomach. This did not help.






We finally started getting close, and yippy freakin skippy, about ¾ of mile 12 were through an underpass. At this point I was barely holding on to my sub-2 goal at around a 9:11 pace, and the tunnel was so claustrophobic and creepy – I thought I was picking up the pace, when my splits say a different story. We made it out, crested one last hill, and entered the narrowest part of the course. Even if I had wanted to sprint, I wouldn’t have been able. It was so crowded. Just look at the finish:






So yeah, official time was 2:01:18. That 1:18 could have been from stopping to stretch my hammy around mile 9, walking through a water stop at 10, and of course, the pee break. Such a puss, I am. I was kind of pissed. I didn’t expect to PR here, but when I saw sub-2 in reach midway through, I got a bit excited. I just didn’t have it in me that day, I guess.

yeah lady, I feel your pain

Overall, a pretty decent race. I was not a fan of the last 5 miles. I understand the logistical nightmare of closing down streets for a half marathon, but the West Side Highway? REALLY? That’s boring, mid-tier race shit. When you come to NYC to race, and pay $128 in the process, you should get a bit more of NYC besides 2 miles through midtown. The park is pretty, but whatever.

Medal was kinda shitty, no idea what was in the swag bags since I never got mine, and didn’t go to the post race festival. Grabbed my burrito blanket and snuck out through a gap in the fence to meet my parents, go back uptown and shop at Barney’s. Rough freakin life, right?






Next step will be some speed work this summer. I’m guessing I’ll try and do the Houston Half in October, and Philly full in November. The summer is out because of heat, and I don’t want to travel too much, in order to save vacation for my wedding. I learned some valuable lessons in this race, and while it sucked and it hurt, I’m already itching to fix the mistakes I made.

strawberry balsamic glazed salmon

I’ve been really disappointed with my Pinterest finds lately. I mean, the recipes that I end up making are ok – perfectly edible, but just missing something. I guess I have high expectations, but to be honest, I was beginning to lose faith in my beloved Pinterest.

Then, this little salmon gem popped up on my feed. I paired that bad boy with a Paleo green bean recipe I saw on a blog, and instantly all was right with the world. Best part? Pretty freakin easy!

So I’m gonna break it down into the salmon and the beans, obviously they can and should be going together at the same time, but everyone has a different kitchen multitasking comfort level, and as long as your prep is completed before the stove turns on, you should be good to go.

So, ROASTED SALMON WITH STRAWBERRY BALSAMIC GLAZE!

For the glaze, you will need:

- About one cup of strawberries, chopped
- 4 tbsp balsamic vinegar
- 4 tbsp water
- 4 tbsp honey

And same salt, pepper, and 2 salmon fillets. Or, like me, you can buy a big one and do a complete hack job breaking it down into two pieces. Its cool – I only left about a third of the bottom of one side attached to the skin.

So get out a decent sized sauce pan, and bring the vinegar, water and berries to a boil. Let that simmer and reduce by half. I honestly was running around the kitchen a bit like a mad woman last night (because my almost 8 month old puppy has decided to start peeing everywhere), so I’m at a loss for an exact time. Errrr 7ish minutes? Whatever.






Meanwhile, preheat your oven to 400. Put the fillets on a foil lined baking sheet, salt and pepper em, and stick em in the over for 10-15 mins. I think mine got 12.

Once the glaze has reduced, add the honey. Reduce some more. Maybe another 4-5 minutes on the stove.






At this point, you can either mash the mixture up manually, or be lazy like me, and puree it in your Magic Bullet. Your choice. When the salmon is ready to serve, drizzle the yummy sticky goodness all over those bad boys.

Now, the green beans. Specifically, COCONUT-ALMOND GREEN BEANS. You like the caps thing I’m doing?

For the beans, you will need:

- Green beans (duh) – however many you plan to eat, I guess I made like 2-3 handfuls worth? Very scientific, I know, but yeah, trim them before hand
- ½ cup coconut milk
- Slivered almonds (about a tbsp)
- 1/3 onion, chopped
- 2 garlic cloves, diced
- Coriander
- Cumin
- Paprika
- Red pepper flakes (optional)
- Lime juice






Heat some oil in a pan and sauté the almonds for a few minutes, watching them closely. Remove once they start to brown. In the same pan, sauté the onions, garlic, cumin, coriander and paprika (and red pepper if you're adding it) for about 4-5 minutes, until the onions are translucent and starting to barelyyyyy brown. As for the amount of spices, I dunno, do it to taste. I did about 2-3 wrist flicks from each container. I’m uber helpful, I know.






Add the coconut milk and the green beans and make sure everything is thoroughly mixed. Bring the mixture to a simmer, then cover the pan and let cook for 6-8 mins, depending on how crunchy you like your beans. Remove the cover, and let the mixture cook down a bit more, about 1-2 mins. Remove from heat, stir in the almonds and couple of squirts of lime juice.

Now, you can plate everything all pretty and stuff or just dump it on the plate. I went with a mixture of the two. I did garnish the salmon with some chopped strawberries, though. They were a nice touch and added some freshness to the dish.






Enjoy!

when the boy's away, the girl will play... in the kitchen

As much as I hate it when my fiancé is away (cue cheesy romcom soundtrack!), it gives me a chance to play around with recipes I normally wouldn't touch because I know he'd just roll his eyes at my experimentation and cook up some mac n cheese for himself while I'm left to sulk at the counter, just me and my experiment.

Sob story and run-on sentence aside, I decided to play around with some fresh cauliflower I picked up at the farmer's market on Wednesday. And get a little pseudo paleo while I was at it.

Hold the phone, you say! Paleo? What the eff!? Long story short... The Paleo Diet encourages us to eat as our Paleolithic ancestors did - aka meats, nuts, fruit, veggies... And that's about it. No dairy, no processed crap. Mostly is focuses on fresh, whole food. Which I can get behind. However, I need me some cheese and the occasional sammich. So instead of going hardcore paleo, I try to avoid as much processed crap as possible, and not eat pasta 7x a week. As a runner, I believe in the power of the starch!

Anyway, my pseudo-paleo cauliflower experiment was.... DRUM ROLLLLL.... cauliflower pizza crust!

Now, this was straight up an experiment that actually turned out ok, but there are a few tweaks I will make for next time to make it even better. I shall detail these as I go.

Alright, for the crust:

- 1 head of cauliflower, chopped into florets
- 1 cup shredded mozz (I used low fat)
- 1 egg
- garlic powder and Italian seasoning to taste

Preheat oven to 450 first.

Then chop up those florets and throw em in a food processor:





Blitz the hell out of them until they resemble couscous, like so:





Throw the faux couscous in a microwave safe container and cook for 8 mins. The water in the cauliflower will cook it naturally.

Tip: since you will end up with more cauliflower than you need, may I suggest a tupperware for nuking? If only to reduce your dirty dishes (I HATE DIRTY DISHES). Whatever you don't use can be thrown in the fridge for later.

Alright, in a bowl mix one egg, 1 cup mozz, and 1 cup cauliflower. Spray a cookie sheet with cooking spray and dump the goopy mixture on it.





Yummmm, right?

Get a little dirty here, and use your fingers to create a pizza shape.





Pop that bad boy in the oven for 15 mins, but WATCH IT CLOSELY. I did not and mine burned around the edges.

Meanwhile....

Toppings! I decided to do my fave summer pizza, since it was all 85 degrees in march and such yesterday - zucchini corn pizza with cilantro! I did not have fresh cilantro, so I cheated





Nor did I have limes. A squirt of lime juice would have been nice. ANYWAY...

Slice some zucchini super thin (the amount is a matter of personal taste), and throw it in a bowl with olive oil, corn kernels (fresh are better, but I used frozen). If you are cheating like me, toss the cilantro paste in too.

Chop up some red onions, or if you have none, like me, shallots will do. Or yellow onions. Whatever.





Once the crust is lightly golden brown, sprinkle your toppings on the pizza. Throw some shredded parmesan on top, along with salt, pepper, and red pepper flakes - all to taste. (have you noticed my disdain for measuring shit?)

Preheat your broiler (I went with the "LO" setting), and pop the tray back in the oven for a few minutes - just enough for the cheese to melt.

(Tip - where I went wrong on this one is expecting the shallots to soften under the broiler. They did, but not enough. If I do these toppings on faux crust again, I will most def soften them up in some olive oil, first. If you do these toppings on regular pizza crust, no need to pre-soften.)

Alright, next take the pizza out and dollop some goat cheese all over. The original recipe called for feta, but feta freaks me out for some reason. It's, like, not cheese. So goat cheese it is. You still get the tang that everyone says feta has, without the creepy texture.

Also, I sliced up half an avocado and put that on top, too. Why? Because everything is better with avocado. And because the burned parts stuck to the tray and the whole thing kinda fell apart when I put it on a plate, so the avocado slices hid the damage for photo ops.





VOILA!

As you can see, I let some pretty good burnage occur. I would recommend erring on the side of caution during the first round in the oven, bc the broiling will crisp up everything some more, which is what brought the edges to burned beyond being edible.

THAT SAID... how did it taste?

Ok, so this is definitely a fork and knife pizza, because the crust is not thick enough to support a ton of toppings. However, I surprisingly enjoyed it. The goat cheese was awesome, the crust had a little melty-cheese taste to it, and overall it was a perfectly acceptable vehicle for pizza toppings. It in no way replaces a perfect, carbolicious pizza crust, but if you're looking for a super healthy way to shovel some cheese and veggies in your mouth, this ain't a bad way to do it.

I bet any array of toppings would be awesome. Next time I may go for my old standby of pesto, fresh mozz and diced maters. And avocado too, I'm sure. Maybe a little drizzle of balsamic? I don't know, I just don't know if I'll have enough time.

idiotzzz - parking garage etiquette and other fails

How NOT To Park Like an Asshat:

Please, for the love of all that is holy, if you drive a small or sub-compact car, don't pull all the way into the parking spot, therefore obscuring from view your car. Those of us who thrive off the early morning high that a clutch parking spot brings will only feel compelled to curse you and perhaps leave you a nasty note to let you know the degree to which you deflated our happy morning.

Also, driving a Bentley doesn't entitle you to two whole parking spots. Just a PSA for ya...

Skinny-bashing:

I work out bc a) I enjoy it and b) I CLEARLY enjoy food. So fuck off - yeah, you, fat ladies at work who are eating their fifth donut of the day. That is all.

Crazy Relatives Who Send You Holiday Themed Hand Towels When All You Really Want is a Crate and Barrel Gift Card:

Need I say more? On another note, congrats, Goodwill of Houston! You are now the proud recipient of some Easter bunny candy dishes and Santa Clause pot holders, among other goodies.

And yes, I've straight up asked for a C&B gift card for future birthdays/holidays, only to be denied.

that rachael ray doesn't lie... this is really a 30 minute meal

Alright, this is one of my old standbys for when I cannot for the life of me decide what to make and want something easy that still makes me feel accomplished. Which is a tall order.

I also try to forget that this is a Rachael Ray recipe because she annoys the snot out of me. So just forget I said anything about her.

Ok, we are gonna make some Thai curry shrimp over basil lime couscous.

For the shrimp, you need:

- cooking oil
- shrimp (peeled and tails off)
- red curry paste
- 2 green onions, chopped
- 2 cloves of garlic
- ginger root, smashed
- umm, a bunch of shiitake mushrooms, diced
- 1 roasted red pepper
- 1/2 cup of coconut milk

For the couscous:

- 3/4 cup of chicken broth
- 3/4 cup of couscous
- 1 tbsp butter
- zest of one lime
- basil leaves

Now, before we start, I want to stress that a lack of exact measurements is OKKKKKK. I mean, doesn't it make you feel all iron chef to just throw things in a pot willy nilly at your discretion? So in the case of this here recipe, the only measurements that matter are for the couscous, and only because you need the 1:1 ratio for consistency.

Alright, let's get started!

You can be classy and shiz and buy fresh shrimp for this, but since they'll be coated in yummy sauce, it really doesn't matter. May I suggest having a bag of frozen and peeled shrimp on hand, like so?





(don't worry, this recipe gets even more lazy as it goes. It's awesome)

While those babies are defrosting in room temp water, let's get our mise en place going. (GAWD I love saying that)

So yeah, chop up the mushrooms, onions, pepper and garlic. I went with a 4:1 ratio of mushrooms to green onion, because mushrooms cook down a lot:





Oh ps, that roasted red pepper came from a jar. See, told you this is a cheater recipe. Fuck roasting your own peppers. That only leads to the smoke alarm going off.

Next cheat? Ginger paste. Hellll yeah!





I found mine near the herbs at the grocery store. Can also be found in the Asian aisle.

By now, the shrimpies should be defrosted and ready to go. Throw some oil in a nonstick pan over high heat, and sauté for 2 mins, stirring constantly. Add in your green onions, garlic, mushrooms and a few squirts of ginger paste and sauté another 3-4 mins, still stirring.





Add in the coconut milk,





And red peppers and curry paste. I seriously have no clue what the original recipe called for with the curry. I just dolloped it in, like so:





So, errr, like 3 dollops? 2? Whatever

Bring the heat to low and let everything simmer and mix and meld and get delish!

MEANWHILE...

Ok don't freak. The couscous is gonna be going simultaneously. When I see recipes asking me to have 2 or 3 pots going at once, I get super nervous and my palms get sweaty. But couscous is sooo easy.

At some point while the shrimp are defrosting, add the butter, lime zest and chicken broth to a saucepan. Bring to a boil. Dump in couscous. Turn off heat, stir, cover. The end. When you're ready to stir, fluff that stuff and tear up some basil (or chop, if youre more civilized than I) and mix or together. Serve the shrimp and sauce on top of a nice fluffy bed o' couscous. Enjoy.

from my momma... sweet taters!

So I'm not really sure where my love for food and cooking came from and whether it can be solely attributed to one source, but regardless, my mother has given me a lot of standby recipes for easy staples. I tend to tweak them here or there, depending on my tastes at the moment, but they always remind me of her.

Ok, enough sappy shit. I present to you... (drum roll)... the best mashed sweet potatoes everrrr.

Best part about this recipe? No measurements.

Ok so peel as many sweet potatoes as you want (I personally go with 2) and chop them into chunks, so as to better facilitate softening them. I mean, if you want to stare at 2 whole sweet potatoes boiling away for 174 minutes, be my guest! I, however, do NOT recommend this.

Alright, now boil some water. While you're waiting for that, pop some bacon in the oven.

Then throw the taters in the water and boil until soft. This batch took approx 15 minutes.





Once soft, throw them in a mixing bowl. Add, to taste, the following:

- butter
- low fat cream cheese
- nutmeg
- dried dill
- salt
- pepper

Seriously, just toss it all in. I used, ummm, 2 tbsp of butter? And like 2 spoonfuls of cream cheese? I dunno.





Yeah, whatever amount that is above.

Mix that all up. Top with chopped green onions and crumbled bacon (durrr). Consume. Enjoy.

Ps this shit reheats great.





nommmm

Thanks mommy for the recipe!

An awesome way to save a whopping $0.68

Alright, so I was super stoked about a few recipes I found on pinterest and my flipboard app last week, and I was even more jazzed to write them up. I'm starting to like this whole deal, what can I say?

Except... The recipes were mehhhh. Not totally suck-tastic, but definitely not worth the time it took to prepare them. I was discouraged last week, to say the least.

So I'm scouring the interwebz extra hard today, looking for some recipes to redeem myself. I'm hoping a couple of them involve bacon.

Anyway, to tide my 3 readers over... Remember when I told y'all how I love green onions and buy a fresh bunch every week, because they are awesome? Well, in case that extra $0.68 a week is really straining your budget, here is a neat trick:

After you cut off all the green parts an are left with the bulb, stick that bad boy in some water. Why, you might ask? Because in about a week, you will have something that looks like this:





That right there is my own little regrown bunch of green onions. And $0.68 saved on my grocery bill this month. Not only does this make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside (that's the 1/2 Jew in me), but since I kill every green thing I've ever planted, seeing these babies sprout up before my very eyes gives me some weird sort of satisfaction.

So I will leave you with one of my favorite uses for green onions - BREAKFASSSTTTT NOMMMM






Scrambled eggs with green onions and parsley, bacon, toast and half an avocado.

Now if I could magically regrow some avocados, we would be in biz-nasssss